Nightmares
by Jaidfyre
Summary: This is set some time after Rose finds her way back to her universe and is reunited with the Doctor. You can tell that the Doctor is tormented by his past but guards himself even from Amy and River. I feel he wouldn't be like that with Rose.


"No! NO! You can't! NOOO! Doooonnnn't!"

"Doctor? Doctor?" Rose cried out gently trying to wake him from his nightmare.

The Doctor sat bolt upright with a mixture of fear and sadness in his eyes. It had been weeks since he last had slept and he had collapsed into what he had hoped would be a dreamless sleep.

Groggily, he put his head in his hands and slowly worked them through his hair.

"Doctor?" Rose pressed gently, slipping her hand into his giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Please, let me help you, if not for yourself, then for me. I can't stand to see you in pain."

She knew what she was doing using this tactic against him. He always buckled when it came to her because he could never stand to cause her pain.

Sighing, the Doctor looked up, "Rose, remember on the Crucible when Davros exposed who I truly am?"

"Of course I remember, but. . ."

"Shhh," he stopped her, "at that moment flashing through my mind were all of the people who have sacrificed their life to spare mine. That haunts me Rose, that there are those out there that have lost their lives for someone so flawed as myself. I thought I would never have asked that of anyone but I have since we've last seen each other and I feel. . .I feel. . ." the Doctor couldn't find the right words to finish his thoughts.

"Doctor, my dear Doctor." Rose shook her head in wonder at this remarkable contradiction of a man. So cocky and self-assured yet humble at the same time. Smiling oh so kindly at him and cupping his face in her hands, she gathered the words to explain. She knew she needed just the right words to allay his fears at least a fraction.

"Think for just a moment, Doctor, just think of all of the lives you've saved. Think of all the good you've done. Now look at me. Noooo, look at me." Rose insisted as he ducked his head down bashfully. Gently bringing his face up to hers she continued, "I can see it in your eyes. I always have been able to. And so can others. The strength and caring behind the depths of whatever color your eyes happen to be at the moment. The reason we are willing to sacrifice so much is not just for you as a person but for you as an idea. What you represent. The fact that you are willing to and _have_ given up so much for so many others inspires us to live and love for something bigger and better than ourselves. We know that you make the right decisions and that you are capable of SO MUCH more than SO MANY people that it is worth it to keep you alive so that you can continue being the amazing inspiring person that you are."

The Doctor could no longer meet Rose's eyes at this point as he had to duck his head once again to hide the tears that would come unwillingly to his eyes.

"Oh, Rose, Rose, Rose. I am not that amazing person." He mumbled incoherently under his breath. "I'm just a madman with a box. Why won't anyone believe me when I tell them that?"

"Oh but you are!" Rose said, the smile coming out in her words. "Tell me, Doctor, what do you think of me?"

"You?" the Doctor blustered, surprised into looking up at her once more, "You're simply magnificently clever, you human you. Look at all you have accomplished! You've saved my life on several occasions. You found your way back to me from a parallel world, TWICE! You are simply astounding Rose!"

"Ha! Why thank you, Doctor." Rose exclaimed blushing this time, then continued, "Now ask me what I think of myself."

"No! Why would I do something as silly as that? I know that all I'll get out of you is a lot of rubbish. . .ohhhh"

Rose lifted an eyebrow at him and gave him one of her typical smiles that always made him light up internally. "You see, don't you?" She asked simply.

"I see what you are TRYING to get at, yes." the Doctor grumbled. "You're a long way off from convincing me of anything of that sort, you, mad impossible girl."

"Oi, I'm older than I look! You can stop calling me a girl anytime now! Like you're one to talk you baby, since you last regenerated!"

"Fancy that, actually getting offended by being referred to as a girl! Only you, Rose Tyler, take it as a compliment and go over there and do something, I don't know, useful." He said waving her away and dismissing her off handedly in that way he does when he's unable to control his emotions.

"Alright, but I'm not done with you yet." Rose threatened with a relieved smile knowing that for now, she had been able to keep his rampant insecurities at bay.


End file.
